At this moment, a handful of us intrepid b-school candidates are pulling a sorta kinda Jessie Spano. Ufda!
Granted, it’s a well-known fact that less than 5% of applicants have a band named Hot Sundae. Anyway.
My drug of choice hasn’t been caffeine pills to help me solve complex geometry questions. No, friends, I’ve become addicted to the Business Week Forums and the never-ending stream of tomfoolery contained within. I’ve discovered during my brief jaunt there that my fellow applicants-in-crime fall into four distinct categories:
#1. The Uber-Achiever
Yes, folks, he doesn’t NEED a Crackberry — he can send email telepathically through his handheld addin’ machine! He’s so good, he invented the GMAT. Note the green book-holding lower hand has several razor-sharp appendages, because when he’s not saving the world, he’s busy returning in time to assassinate future military leaders.
#2. The Veiled Humorist
This is TOTALLY me. Spends his time convincing everyone else he’s totally aloof, pretending to not worry about the application process or, in more complete terms, life itself. But really, we all know what he’s packin’.
#3. The Mooch
Sorta me. The mooch is an easy one to spot: he treats random message board posters as if they’re both members of the admissions committee and your spouse. In fact, he devotes less time to his spouse because of the incessant amount of time he spends pandering to those who have better things to do. Usually spotted trolling around message boards asking when he’s going to get an interview invitation.
#4. The Total Neurotic:
Scared to death of not only applying to, but also hearing back from, admissions schools. Typically, the T.N. is the first to admit that he brought upon himself this downward spiral of doubt, fear, and regret, yet tends to place the blame on the schools for not responding to his email within 10-15 minutes. Typical posts are time-stamped “2:14 am” and can be found engaging in some sketchy extracurriculars to develop a better relationship with the school of his choice.